A soft shoe in

A Soft Shoe In...
I'm scufffleing in the sawdust again at the usual pace. Dragging my foot at one point like the Mummy then kicking at the dust like Gene Kelly at a puddle. Dirt or rain water it's all the same, like diamond scatter at twilight.
In the novel "A Whale's Lament (at not being able to play trombone)" I describe it like this:
"Everything twizzles into pixie dust, sparkles, then fades away..."
Or, also from Whale's Lament:
"It's like crossing the Sahara in flippers."
Its been several very difficult months since the last blog. Bless me father... I've lost my 14th computer to hackers and vandals. Threats have highlighted a few areas in my personal security and in the state of my PTSD with a laser light show. My home has been broken into several times. My mind and heart have both been scavanged.
PTSD and security concerns go together really well. It's like juggling fireballs or shooting snooker.
My biggest gains are in my work with the new animals in my life. I've had to gently adjust to cats, birds and cockroaches. Gentleness is the most amazing of tools in the harshest of environments.
I've had some recovery issues that I've need to tend to. I've slowed down considerably. I was lucky to be functional three hours a day. My eyes followed my hands into motion like snowflakes falling softly on a field. I have learned an enourmous amount about electronics and medical care in the tiniest of ingriments. There were days when I could not tell you what I had done for hours on end. But the gains were obvious. this paying attention thing, hyperfocus in slow motion is the most amazing thing about a certain phase of autism and recovery from brain damage.
As the Little Prince (from the book of the same name) would probably note, I am very concerned about matters of consequence. As such I have been stuccoed up in my own brain matter fixing pin holes.
I'll be back with those matters at hand in the next blog. I'll bring my new experiences and the stucco with me.
Right now, I am kicking at the sand and doing my favorite Bob Hope and Red Buttons vaudeville steps with a little wicked hula thrown into the mix. I have gyroscoped my passages back into the daily kicks of my perceptions. There is nothing like a little dance in the dessert in inappropriate shoes to get you going on new days like this one.
In short: I'm back with new things to spill out of. I'm glad to be here.
I've already been hacked.